Sunday, June 7, 2009

Who am i? a part of you.

Not one for shallow things of the universe. As of June 5th,2009.. I am a changed person.

No one can comprehend the fire currently burning within me. A treacherous,powerful flame. Its more than beautiful,for its actual beauty. It flutters from baking,boiling heat,to frigid ice cold..

Ive found my moments of strength, yet in a few hours i'm yet to fall.

A mixture of pleasure,and pain... faint happiness and pure agony.


Between complete denial,and acceptance. Shock and realization.

Terrified of actuality yet it very well may be what lifts me off my feet...

here I am...replaying Street spirit and trying not to cry.
Planning my trip to see you..
Planning my trip to see the world..everything.


I feel like i'm alone now.

I feel like i'm talking in riddles and pretty phrases to airheads who can only mock and blink in confusion..
but honestly,i'm not trying at all..its just whats in my head..and i'm transitioning it into these... le t t e r s individually comming together, compounding into.. .meaning.

yet i dont feel alone at all. I feel you.. in my hair as the wind,above as the sky.below as the sand..
here in my head,my heart.
your voice,ur spirit.


you... you were beautiful. we..we were in sync. you understand,because you were drawn to the universe and now the universe is drawing me..

is it you? perhaps so.

I feel... a deadly,serious need.to feel... to live,laugh,experience. hurt,smile.break,build.

As of June 5th,2009.. I am disorder free.

The world looks so different now..everything is beautiful,more beautiful than it has ever been.

I dont understand the way anyone else feels.. because i'm too wrapped up in how I Feel..how you felt..

so nothing else makes any sense to me.

Ive strayed very very far from science, from..the typical. now into..a spiritual place.. the kind where nonbelievers could never dare to go,let alone lurk...
and it feels so alone here in this beautiful spiritual place of extravagant energy,.,

why couldnt I share this with you when i had the chance?