I am not numb.

Written on:Monday, April 21, 2008

I'm not numb.. I cant be numb. No matter how much I feel,break,or go through.. my emotions are still here.I still want so much,I still have this "Strength" to try again. Strength?or maybe..its weakness. I'm not sure right now. all i know is,even though i wish I was numb..I am not. I'm not numb,and i'm not sure if thats an advantage,or a disadvantage.. forture,or misforture.. an amazing quality...or a loss. A loss,of no loss of feelings. that makes complete sense to me,yet at the same time..it doesnt. why havent I ended up like him,now?at this point.. i should be numb,by this time.. but im not.. nothing could ever make me numb alcohol pills drugs endless amount of sex with strangers. (nice try,nick). It couldn't ever work.